Motherhood is amazing but it can also feel isolating, overwhelming, and relentless. In these uncertain times, many mothers are carrying more than ever: emotional labor, caregiving, financial stress, and the invisible weight of generational healing. 

Many mothers are working, some are caring for aging parents, and others are struggling to find time for themselves to find themselves again. The fourth trimester was the hardest for me. I felt like I was engulfed in the mother role, that I didn’t know who I was anymore. 

Now, juggling motherhood, a divorce, 2 part-time jobs as a Doctor of Physical Therapy and starting my new business, it’s the most important now than ever to take care of myself. You can’t pour from an empty cup AND you shouldn’t have to. 

This post offers 10 gentle mental health tips for moms, backed by research. A happy healthy mother is the foundation for your child, your relationships and what you give into the world. 

These practices are simple, flexible, and designed to fit into the chaotic day to day as a mother. Some have affiliated links for your convivence to shop as needed.

🌿 1. Start Your Day with a Grounding Ritual

Whether it’s sipping Vietnamese coffee (see recipe), seeping a warm cup of tea, sitting in the sun, or stretching for 3 minutes, a morning ritual creates emotional stability and consistency. Studies show that predictable routines reduce anxiety and improve mood.

My morning ritual consists of rehearsing my life and manifesting before I get out of bed. While I’m still in the state of sleep and awake, I list the things I’m grateful for, I let go of negative thoughts and feelings in order to start new, and I invite all positive and successes to come into my life. 

I also delay my caffeine intake and have switched more towards making a Matcha Latte instead. Click on the link to go to my easy (way cheaper than Starbucks) matcha latte recipe. 🍵

📝 2. Keep a Journal

Write down one feeling, one gratitude, and one intention. Journaling, even for 2 minutes, can regulate emotions and reduce depressive symptoms. I keep my journal on my bedside and I write down all the things I’m grateful for and my goals right before I go to bed. Priming the brain to focus on gratitude and vision will keep you focused on the positives.

I also write down affirmations I say out loud as well. No one is your biggest fan but YOU. Do you have a mirror? Write affirmations on that. Sign up for my e-list for daily affirmations.

🧘‍♀️ 3. Breathe Deeply for 5 Minutes

As simple as it sounds, intentional breathwork activates the parasympathetic nervous system. This will calm the body and reduce cortisol. Cortisol is the stress hormone that gets released when you are stressed out and puts you into fight or flight, survival mode. Try box breathing or simply inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4. 

If you’re a visual person, imagine filling your belly with air and then letting it slowly leak out through your mouth. Focus on how your body feels when you take these breaths. Let thoughts just float on by, don’t feed into them. 

I use the free app called Insight Timer for deep breathing and guided meditation. It was recommended by my therapist and I’ve found it to help me get started in the practice.

📱 4. Limit Social Media to 30 Minutes

What has been a game changer in detoxing my mental clutter is decreasing screen time. Digital overwhelm contributes to anxiety and comparison fatigue especially in this political climate. Setting boundaries around screen time improves focus and emotional resilience. 

If you’re an iphone user like me (no hate please) there are screen time settings. I have to go through multiple steps in order to open a social media app from the times of 8am-8pm (times I chose). It helps remind me that I do not need to be on these apps, it has to be a conscious CHOICE and not a click out of habit. 

The quick dopamine hits cause addition. There are studies that show this in kids who have trouble with withdrawal when they are in school. Find yourself irritable often? Unable to focus, mind always jumping from topic to topic? Try checking your screen and social media consumption. 

🧺 5. Do One Thing that you LOVE

We all get buried with the mundane tasks of being a mother: laundry, dishes, cooking, cleaning, you name it. Do one thing that you love for yourself. It could be taking a salt bath, putting on a korean face mask, reading a few chapters in a book, or even checking on your sourdough starter and making a loaf. 

We do a lot for others but we forget to do it for ourselves. That’s the nature of motherhood but it doesn’t have to be that way. Our passions and our hobbies before having children still matter. Also, I want to show Alaric that I have more to offer than just being his mom. He will see me play tennis, paint, knit a blanket, go to concerts, and hopefully grow up wanting to explore hobbies of his own.

💬 6. Connect with One Supportive Person

This is something I do often because it’s built into one of my core values. A short voice note, text “hey, just checking in”, or call can shift your emotional state. Social connection is one of the strongest protective factors against maternal depression. It’s also part of being a human.

Human beings, believe it or not, are social creatures. It is in our DNA to crave and seek out connection. You can be an introvert, but still on some level, want connection to at least one other human. Life is busy for everyone, but I guarantee you, sending a simple text to let someone know you’re thinking about them will probably make their day and yours. 

🚶‍♀️ 7. Mindful Movement

Stretching, walking around the block or even just down your drive way, or dancing for 10 minutes improves circulation, mood, and sleep quality. Even low-impact movement has measurable mental health benefits. It doesn’t have to be a full 60 minute yoga session. 

Stay tuned for PT inspired stretches and exercises especially for moms carrying their baby or babies, all day. 

🧠 8. Speak kindly to yourself

Speak to yourself like you would to your child or to a good friend. Research shows that self-compassion reduces anxiety, shame, and burnout in people, especially mothers. Your inner voice can be reprogrammed. Reprogramming is called neuroplasticity, where your brain can change and adapt. Giving yourself that patience and grace especially in time of need will prevent burn out.  

I’ve been writing self affirmations on my mirror with these bright dry erase markers. Waking up and seeing “today is going to be a great day” in the mirror, in my own handwriting really helps to set my mind up to succeed. My cousin sent me these new mothers affirmation cards I found to be comforting as well. 

🍲 9. Nourish Yourself Intentionally

Eat one meal slowly, without multitasking. Life moves fast. Life as a mom moves even faster. Slow things down whenever you can. Slow your brain and choose foods that support gut health like congee, bone broth, or fermented veggies. Fermented veggies are linked to improved mood and cognition. If you’re breast feeding, protein, vitamins and minerals will be your allies. 

🌙 10. End Your Day with a Soft Closure

Dim the lights, light a candle, draw a salt bath, play calming music, read a book or write a closing thought in your journal. Similarly to a morning routine, have a routine to wind down to. You’ve worked hard, you and your kids survived another day, and you deserve 10 minutes to just simply be. 

Remember, a healthy happy mom = a healthy happy kid

10 things is a lot. If you are overwhelmed, just start with adding 1 thing to your day working your way up to 10. The key here is intention and putting yourself on the list of people you care for. 10 is not a limit by all means, it’s just a target goal. 

If you belong to the tamagotchi generation, you may be interested in the free app Finch. It is a self care virtual pet that allows you to get your dopamine hit from checking off productivity and self care tasks. I use it daily and I’ll be the first to admit, it is easier to care for a virtual pet than myself some days. It must be my blue print programming based on my Vietnamese culture.

If you want to be friends on Finch, my friend code is FBQD9QJXXw, Thuy Tien & Kiwi. This is not a paid affiliation, I just really love this free app to help me reframe the importance of taking care of myself along with a million other things I’m responsible for.

The amount of energy, time and effort you pour into others should equal the same amount poured into yourself. Don’t forget to put yourself on the list of people you care for. You are deserving and worthy. Here is your reminder that you’re doing amazing.

Let me know how these small actions create huge impact in preventing burnout in moms. Check out my recipes if you’re feeling burnt out and in need of some easy healthy meals for you and your family. Here is a link to a pin that lists everything from this blog post so you have easy access to it on your phone. You can even save it as your phone’s background a gentle reminder.